The Filter

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My son is quite patient by nature, but I was watching as his frustration quickly mounted. There is nothing as maddening for a 12-year-old boy as a lawnmower that keeps stalling out when you are trying to get through another round of lawn chores. My husband had been trying to get the mower fixed, but the local handyman never seemed to be home. However, as David struggled with his job, a kind neighbor came over and started to check out the equipment. He quickly told us that our problem was a dirty filter and he easily remedied the issue.

Filters are meant to keep certain things out. Their purpose is to keep things clean and in good working order. We all use filters in our daily lives. Not just in things like refrigerators, cars and vacuum cleaners, but also in things like our hearts, minds and emotions. From the time we are children, we start to install filters into our perceptions and interpretations to protect ourselves from things that seem harmful. Sometimes these are good filters. For example, the Bible tells us in Proverbs 4:23 to “Keep your heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” In other words, God is telling us we should install filters around our heart because garbage in will contaminate the quality of our existence. However, sometimes filters get dirty or wrongly installed and we tend to keep sputtering out and we don’t understand why. We don’t notice that we have installed thick filters of self-protection, defensiveness, mistrust, neediness, anger, boastfulness and a myriad other things in the hope of keeping hurtful things out. What we fail to realize is that what these filters are really doing is blocking out the good and necessary and instead of protecting our lives, they are choking us to death. Before you give up on that project, idea or relationship… check the filter!

Love Doesn't Care

The shouting, the tears, the jumping up and down all may have seemed a bit excessive to the casual observer, but none of this mattered to her! In the big picture of life, it was a relatively small victory but you would not have known this by watching her celebrate this small milestone. She had set a goal, done the work and made it happen, and now it was time to wholeheartedly celebrate! Her husband stood close by, witnessing this unbridled display of emotion which would have caused many ego-sensitive males to cringe in embarrassment or quietly slink to the nearest bathroom, but not this gentleman! With his arm slung around his rejoicing wife, copious tears of pride rolled down his rough face. It was not his accomplishment, not his achievement nor his personal victory, but one would never have known that by watching his expression of pure joy that reflected the happiness of his emoting wife. Self-consciousness was absent. Self-centered pride was carried away in the river of other-centered pride. It didn't matter what others thought, opined or said concerning the matter because the love in his heart just didn't care.

It is reminiscent of a man on a Cross. Bleeding, hurting, grieving, suffering, with rivers of blood streaming down his face. It was not His crime, not His transgression nor His fault. Self-consciousness was absent. Self-centered pride was carried away in a river of other-centeredness. It absolutely did not matter what others thought, opined or said concerning the matter because the love in his heart just didn't care.

The quality of our love is not measured as much by how much we care, but by how much we find we don't care when the whole world is watching. True love is not focused on managing opinions, presentations or criticisms of outsiders but on cultivating the well being of the ones we love at any cost, understood or not. Real love just can't afford to care.